What Do You Mean You're Not A Werewolf?
by WannabeWizardxxx
Summary: one shot- Sirius overhears a conversation between Marlene and her friends and is shocked by what he hears


Marlene, Lily, Alice and Mary all sat down in the great hall as the main courses disappeared and were replaced by platters of dessert. The girls chattered as they served themselves.

"Oi! Black! Pass the trifle will ya!?" Marlene yelled as the said dessert was passed down towards her. Sirius eyed Remus as he heaped copious amounts of anything chocolately onto his plate.

"How do you even eat all of that?" Sirius asked, reaching over James to serve himself pudding.

"You know how much chocolate helps at this time Padfoot.. " Remus answered as he shovelled spoonfulls of dessert into his mouth. Sirius looked on, amused. These were the very rare times Remus was less then courteous, especially when chocolate was involved. Sirius turned back to his plate when he heard hushed whispers of a similar conversation.

" _How do you eat all of that?"_ Lily hissed, as Marlene shoved spoon after spoon of chocolate into her mouth

" _You know how I get at this time of month, I can be a monster_ " Marlene hissed back

" _Oh, we know_!" Alice whispered

" Cranky, moody and always craving chocolate, every month, We've been dorming with you for just under 5 years.. how could we not know" Mary said as Marlene glared at her

" _Shut up! Anyone could hear you!"_ Marlene snapped, then she winced

"Urrgh all my muscles hurt" she whined and continued to eat

" _You aren't a monster Marlene, you're just really cranky"_ Lily smiled

Sirius was shocked, he relayed the conversation in his mind. _Was Marlene a Werewolf!?_ The simialarity was uncanny, she behaved exactly like Remus did in the week before the full moon, Hungry, cranky, moody and in pain, not to mention an extremely sweet tooth. It all added up! Sirius knew what he had to do, he couldn't tell anyone else, besides, it wasn't his secret to tell. As they all headed up to the dorms, Marlene was still on his mind, and she did look a little pale these days.

"Do you think that there are any other werewolves at Hogwarts Moony?" Sirius asked as they walked up to their dorm

"I don't think so, Dumbledore would have told me" Remus replied "It would be dangerous for others and myself if he didn't tell me"

" Why do you ask anyway, you don't think that-" Remus started

"I'm not sure, just something I heard... Well! Time for bed!" Sirius said suddenly, a bit too chipper as they donned on pyjamas and went to sleep. Tommorow, he would have to confront Marlene.

* * *

Sirius woke to the sound of James packing up his gear.

" Oh, you're awake!" James looked at Sirius

"Are you ok? You haven't seemed right since dinner last night" James said, as he sat on his bed, surveying sirius' face.

"Nothing's wrong, don't worry" Sirius asked as he got out of bed and started pulling on his clothes,

"Do you know where Marlene is, by the way?" He asked, ignoring James' confused look,

"Yeah, I think she's in the common room but-" James started, but was cut off as Sirius raced down the stairs. Confused, James grabbed his books and headed down to the common room.

* * *

Sirius approached the group of girls huddled over a pile of books near the fireplace, spotting Marlene he gently tapped her on the shoulder

" _What_ Black?" She said as she faced him, rolling her eyes. Sirius blanked out, he forgot everything he had repeatedly practised in his head.

"um, can I speak to you privately, it's really important" Sirius pleaded. Marlene glanced questionly at Lily, who shrugged her shoulders in return.

"Uh yeah, sure..." Marlene said as Sirius grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her to the corner of the room. By this time, the marauders had noticed and they glanced towards the other girls, who looked just as confused.

" So?" Marlene said, looking bored as she twirled a quill between her fingers .

"Umm, i'm just gonna say it real quick but I overheard what you and the girls were saying at dinner last night and well... I completely understand and all why you'd want to keep it a secret and all and I wont tell anyone and-"

"okay, let me stop you right there" Marlene said, raising a hand, " What are you talking about?"

"Iknowyoureawerewolf" Sirius blurted out

"What?"

"I know you're a werewolf, I heard you talking with your friends about how you were hungry and cranky and sore every month, and the full moons coming up and-"

-THWACK

The sound of hand against cheek resonated around the whole room, it seemed as if the sound bounced of the walls, everyone was silent and Sirius noticed that Marlene's face was burning red.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL _FUCK_ BLACK, I AM _NOT A WEREWOLF! YOU ABSOLUTE BLITHERING IDIOTIC BASTARD!"_ Marlene screeched, glaring at Sirius.

Sirius paled

"You- you're not a werewolf?" he asked, rubbing his now reddened cheek

"NO I AM NOT A BLOODY WEREWOLF!" Marlene shouted, she turned around and stormed up the stairs to her dormitory. Sirius turned around to come face to face with Professor McGonagall.

"I think we need to have a talk Mr Black, if you would come with me to my office. He followed Professor /McGonagall out the rtrait door, but as he closed the door, he could hear everyone falling into peals of laughter.

* * *

They arrived at McGonagall's office, and she gestured to the seat in front of her desk.

"Biscuit, Black?" She asked, offering a tub of biscuits. Sirius reached out to grab one.

"Now, what made miss Mckinnon so upset that she had to resort to physical violence, Mr Black?" She asked, as Sirius rubbed his cheek where a hand mark was clearly imprinted.

" I asked her if she was a werewolf and it turns out she isn't.." He said, slowly munching on his biscuit.

"and what made you think she was a werewolf?" She asked

"I overheard her talking to her friends about how at the same time every month that she was extremely hungry and craving chocolate, and that she was always sore and cranky and she looked a bit pale to me these days. Mo- Remus has the same conditions every month too and the full moon is coming up and I figured that i'd ask her" He said, looking sheepishly down at his lap.

McGonagall's face looked stern but Sirius could see a smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

"Grab a few more biscuits Mr Black, it's going to be a long night" She said, holding out the tin

"You see Mr Black, every girl at a certain time of month, goes through, well sort of a change..."

* * *

"And then she continued to tell me everything about their organs and everything!" Sirius moaned hitting a pillow to his face

"I can't believe Padfoot got _The Talk_ from professor McGonagall!" James cried and the three boys fell into another fit of laughter.

THUD

Peter was laughing so much that he hadn't even noticed he had fallen off the bed. Sirius' face turned red

"You don't have to rub it in you know!" He groaned

" But we do!" Remus chimed in and they fell into more laughter

"You're telling me _all_ of you know what it is!?" He asked "Even Wormtail!?"

"It was Hilarious!" Peter laughed

"You should have seen your face!" James exclaimed

"There's still a slap mark on his face" Remus laughed and the boys rolled over laughing

"GUYS be serious!" He moaned and the boys laughed even harder

"We can't be Sirius! You are!"

" I WAS JUST ROBBED OF MY CHILDHOOD!" He yelled and the boys ceased their laughter, a few giggles escaping at times.

"I have to go apologise to Marlene tomorrow" Sirius said, and the boys fell into fits of laughter yet again. Sirius groaned as he lied face down on his bed, no one would let him forget this.


End file.
